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Gentle Redirection

by Nico Boesten

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VIEW THE MUSIC VIDEO:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=n4kv8L4WIQs

First off, full credit to my son and friend, Sylas Boesten (Fathom Films), for offering to shoot and edit his first-ever music video. I am so honoured and stoked to do our first protect together. Also, thanks to Nathan Peacock for helping to shoot and work with the audio on this live off-the-floor recording.

THE STORY

Near the end of my second marriage, I was desperately trying to whisk up hope. Hope for our relationship. Hope that my life could be peaceful again. Hope that this marriage wouldn’t be so bloody painful.

One fall afternoon, as I was riding my motorbike on a high, windy road above Okanagan Lake at life-threatening speeds, I had this fleeting thought: What if I just crank my handlebar and end it? The fact that I even HAD that thought scared me into picturing what would actually happen if I kicked the bucket … and eventually led to the inspiration for this song.

The verses are written for my kids—instructions on what to do with my remains when I have left this earth. The chorus is a conversation between God and me as a bit of a prophetic anthem to my soul to have hope.

The ache of losing my dad (2008) and then my first wife of 16 years to cancer (2014) has left scars for me and our two kids that we are still discovering. I am learning how to properly and fully grieve. How to heal. How to forgive. And the most beautiful thing about these discoveries is that I am not alone.

One night as a couple of my bros and I were hanging out in a hot tub, my buddy Seth read a short passage out of a book he was reading, and as he spoke one of the lines, “gentle redirection,” I was instantly brought to tears. This perspective is one that I am choosing to hang on to as one that resonates with my heart and with the heart of God to all who are working through painful stories of loss, rejection, and distrust.

I hope that my story will inspire your story; you are not alone, and although it may sound simplistic or worse—non-empathic and cliché—it isn’t over.

lyrics

When it’s over lay my ashes beside the ones I love
First to your mama, oh how I wanna
Tell her what I good friend she was
If she could see you now she’d smile
What else would a proud mama do
I didn’t know what life would be without her
Oh my love I still miss you

It’s not over - just a gentle redirection
Your kindness carries me
It’s time to cut a few more trails
I’m hoping that they lead me well
Even if they don’t it’ll be OK

Drive up the hill underneath the water tower
That’s where my old man lies
I wish you could’ve seen the reach of his power
All it took was a look from his eyes
Your legacy revealed itself since you left that hospital room
A body’s only good for so many days
A crave those conversations and the life you spoke to me
You loved so hard and so many ways

Come and fill the spaces
I’ve got to feel it all
I am willing to grieve if it means I can heal
I want to play the long game

credits

released April 16, 2019
Nico Boesten - Fender Rhodes / vox
Nathan Peacock - Audio Recording

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Nico Boesten Kelowna, British Columbia

1:1 Personal & Professional Coach | Musician | Encourager | Adventure-junkie | Entrepreneur | Papa | Respectfully Reckless

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